Thank you, HopeFaithBelieve, for this - another story of yet another child whose life (we all hope) will one day be our child's.
Or at least, I do. :)
It's funny because just now I asked the Huz, "Honey - when NBear has her BAD days - are they GOOD--BAD days?" I laugh just seeing myself type that up, knowing how ridiculous that may look to anyone else. RIDICULOUS! It's either good or bad, right? Black or white? Hot and Cold? Yes and No? In and Out?...oh wait - too much Katy Perry does not a good blogger make! (NBear LOVES that song to death, by the way).
The Huz replies by telling me that she can at least verbalize what she wants now (I know), as opposed to being non-verbal (I know). She knows what she wants, and how to express that (I know), and for that we should be thankful (I am). *sigh* When my friends ask me how she's doing now that she's pretty much off her regular biomeds routine, I answer with a very honest, "I don't notice too much of a difference - I mean, she's still doing fine!" - and then I need to step back and look at the bigger picture: can she be doing BETTER? Did we make a mistake and pull her out too early? It is nerve-wracking indeed.
My gut tells me that we need to wait to replenish our funds first, before plunging back into another DAN! session. But, is it doing her any good?
THAT - is what kills me. :( Bummer.
4 comments:
DMV47,
Thanks for the nice comment! Great to "meet" you, too! Amazing how the internet connects us all to those we would otherwise never find...
Hang in there with your difficult times--you are not alone. When all else fails, find your zen place...or your iPod.
It's HARD to know what to do. It isn't like you can know what would have been with or without certain therapies and the if-onlys can kill you. Keep implementing what you know to work whenever you can, and keep encouraging yourself that the BEST days are still coming up!!!
thanks for the link. I'm adding that book to my list for the library. the video gave me goosebumps.
You are so welcome! I LOVE stories like this. It's not even the stories about the children who recover, but stories of children who are simply doing better. There are many days I run out of energy and even lose a little hope, but then I take the energy from other moms, like Leann, and keep moving forward. Without hope, we have nothing.
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